So, yet again, I know some things went wrong and I just didn't weigh in again last week. But I was overwhelmed and stressed last week about a lot of things and I think it has to do with that. Like holding onto my weight on an unconscious level because I was emotionally struggling.
I weighed myself on Wednesday night, and I know that was a bad idea since it is the whole day's worth of food, water, gravity, etc. But the number was almost to my starting weight. I weigh myself right before I get in the shower with my hair brushed out and with no clothes on. That weigh I slept off anything and I am at least 8 hours fasting.
This is probably very silly to most people, and it is probably a very familiar ritual for others. It just seems to be the way it works best for me.
I wish that my weight was always at the forefront of my mind. I want it to be a constant when I am sitting at my desk and have a snack attack. But it isn't until after. However, this week, I am fairly confident. I need to get better about tracking my points instead of just being conscientious of what I am eating. I need to actually track so I know how many points things are.
I feel as though some people may read this post or even my whole blog (here's hoping... right?) and think that I write about these things all the time, how come I am not doing it?! What is the issue?! You can't seem to get it together. However, there are a LOT of things that go into making weight loss successful.
You have to have all your channels, thoughts, emotions, and dreams in line. You have to DEEP DOWN want to change and it takes a lot of repetition, messing up, research, trial and error, victories, and set backs. However, if it was that easy, I don't think anyone would struggle with it so much, there would be no need for shows like The Biggest Loser, The Swan, Extreme Makeover, My 600 lb. Life, etc. People would gain weight and then lose it. End of story.
Something I have realized is it is easier to be heavy. It is easier to eat whatever you want and never do anything about it. Especially on the income some people live on, and the cost of healthy whole foods versus processed and packaged food. It is made easier in our society, yet we are bombarded by the Thin Ideal in the world. So which is it? Save money and buy these less expensive foods, but also be perfectly healthy and thin! Another interesting thing is how you have to be extremely well off financially. For instance, a gym membership costs a lot of money each month, the gas to drive there costs money, healthy food is expensive, healthy food/organic food is costly, most diet programs are expensive, personal trainers are through the roof with their rates. It is ridiculous to think that those low income people who may be a bit over weight can just simply do it. Especially if they are expected, by society, to use at the 'readily available programs' to accomplish their goal.
Enough about that rant! I think there is a lot to be said about it! But I could go on for hours.
Anyway, all I am saying is I am trying and that is all anyone can do.
I have no idea where this post was going to go, but I want to tell you that I will be weighing in on Thursday no matter the number and I am going to try and do better. That's all any of us can do.
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